Can sexuality heal our trauma? Is self-love and erotic love possible after our physical, emotional, and sexual boundaries are violated? If we are broken, can we ever be whole? Though perfect answers may not be possible, there are always possibilities. Join Sera Miles for an excavating journey through theories of narrative fulfillment, attachment, neurology, and complex defense mechanisms. Trauma distorts our frame of reference, and can occur at any moment in our lives. This workshop will keep in focus that trauma of any sort affects our lives in whole. Discover techniques that may lead you to let go of what you cannot recapture, and thus allow you to reclaim and freshly claim your erotic, sexual, and personal sense of self.
tl;dr? Leather, kinky, ace spectrum, D-type. Educator, activist, perv. Career sex worker. Writer/ editor. Fuck the system.
Print copy? Sera Miles is CEO of People Exchanging Power (PEP). Human sexuality courses at the University of New Mexico, Southwestern College, and University of Denver have welcomed her as a guest speaker; she’s presented at Texas Tech, Central New Mexico Community College, DomConLA and DomConNOLA, Beat Me in St Louis, Northwest Leather Celebration, and Behind Closed Doors in Tucson; and taught workshops for various groups and sex shoppes across the United States. In 2016, the Sexual Assault Nurse Examiners (SANE) of New Mexico invited Sera to speak about BDSM at their annual conference, and the following year, Sera served as the BDSM adviser to the New Mexico Strangulation Task Force. Sera has appeared in numerous fetish videos, some so ancient they require a VCR, and she stars in "Bonetown" and "Bonecraft," the world's first pornographic computer games. For six vibrant years, Sera led New Mexico FetLifers, a social networking group she founded, and which produced the conference "Evolution of the Revolution." She co-founded New Mexico's Sex Workers Outreach Project chapter and organized Albuquerque’s events for the International Day to End Violence against Sex Workers (aka Red Umbrella Day) from 2009 to 2015. Sera, by invitation, spoke at the 2018 March for Trans Rights in Albuquerque, which was an honor that she works to be worthy of. The United Court of Sandias bestowed upon Sera the lifetime title, “Inspiration of the Sandias,” and in 2018, she co-chaired UCS’ Year of the Woman committee, where she spear-headed the #periodpositive project, collecting menstruation supplies to help under-served communities, and working to dismantle cultural shame about periods. Sera identifies as a demisexual leather D-type, in addition to the identities of activist, editor, type-A personality, sex worker, and Leo Dragon.
Sex and Self-Love for Survivors
Sex, Lies, and Infidelity
Ever felt like your best friend was cheating on you with a new acquaintance? Did secrets shred the ties of your extended family? Have you committed an indiscretion for which you still bathe in self-loathing? Secrecy, infidelity, and mendacity occur in all relationships -- familial, platonic, and romantic. Heteronormative. Pansexual. Power exchange. Monogamous. Polyamorous. Why? Join Sera Miles for a discussion of what constitutes infidelity and an in-depth examination of the main reasons why people cheat. We’ll pull apart how secret-keeping patterns, shame, negative self-image, and toxic familial pathologies lead us into behaviors based in mendacity -- as well as into relationships in which we tolerate infidelity. Mendacity and boundary-crossing are deadly, to ourselves and others. You can create new patterns for your relationship and learn how to better negotiate the sickness that secrecy has wrought in your life.
The Art of Storytelling: Incorporating Fantasy Tales into Your Play
We grow up telling stories—in fact, some scientists and linguists wager that the desire to create and tell stories is a critical part of what makes us human. How, then, could storytelling increase the intensity of your play? In this workshop, we’ll discuss the building blocks of spinning a yarn and delve into how storytelling-as-play could work with a partner who is sensory deprived and/or bound. We’ll also consider how storytelling can add erotic intimacy to a long distance relationship. How do you know what story to tell? What do you do if you can’t finish the story? Learn how to troubleshoot the art of storytelling just as you would any other play technique. Best of all, learn how your words and voice can amplify every scene you create. Your mind and imagination has long been in your toy kit—now, let’s add your voice. Note: The workshop as detailed above is crafted for couples. It can easily be modified for single people. Also, the workshop can be adapted for storytelling in various contexts, such as body positivity, disclosing identity, and the framework you have in mind.
The More You Give, the More You Get: Polyamory 101
Learn about the dynamics of polyamory from someone who lives and celebrates a life of many loves. Examine the joys and pitfalls of loving more than one person; common misconceptions about polyamory; and the potential dynamics of living polyamory. This workshop will discuss polyamory as an orientation and moreover give attendees tools for creating positive polyamorist relationships. This class can be taught by Sera and/or Frida, solo or together.